


love like you do

by shadoedseptmbr



Series: Tales from the Shelterverse [4]
Category: Dragon Age
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-11-08
Updated: 2012-11-08
Packaged: 2017-11-18 05:07:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,431
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/557205
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shadoedseptmbr/pseuds/shadoedseptmbr
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Malcolm wasn't Hawke's only teacher.  Leandra was an eavesdropper, too.</p>
            </blockquote>





	love like you do

**Author's Note:**

> _**Author's Note:** : Another Tale from the Shelterverse, another Leandra pov. This one takes place...well, you guess when, dear reader. _
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> _Thanks to mille libri for her timely beta, and as always, all mistakes are my own. Title from John Mayer's song, Daughters._
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> _Bioware owns all, I'm just happy to play in the sandbox._

Aeryn had a small party, just her mad, merry band as she called them. Leandra had eaten and visited a little before withdrawing to her own affairs. She liked this circle Aeryn had built around herself. They were all so colorful and some _were_ merry and some dangerous and all of them in need of a bit of family. 

Anders, who reminded her of Malcolm, with his distracted lazy charm. Varric, who had a tongue like silverite wrapped in velvet. Sweet little Merrill and wicked Isabela. Aeryn's Fenris, who was nearly a staple of the Hawke household, so close that Leandra had once thought they might be lovers. 

But Fenris was the one person Aeryn never seemed to turn that side of herself to. 

It took Leandra a while to understand it - that Aeryn learned somewhere to wield her flirting as a weapon and her body as a defense, but with Fenris, she seemed to feel safe enough to not need it. With Fenris, Leandra saw a side of Aeryn that had disappeared when Carver died; the teasing, wheedling older sister, constantly pulling the temperamental young man out of his doldrums with promises of adventure. 

Aeryn started to come back to herself, once Fenris had joined them. The first real smile Leandra had seen on Aeryn's face in Kirkwall came in a moment with Fenris, Isabela, and Varric, over a boisterous early morning breakfast at Gamlen's after a night out fighting bandits. They'd brought a basket of eggs, loaves of fresh bread, a flat of berries, and a measure of cream and for just an hour or so Leandra had been able to bustle around and feed hungry people in a warm kitchen. It turned out later they were celebrating the end of all the scraping. They'd finally brought in enough coin for the expedition. In the midst of it were Isabela and Varric boisterously jibing one another, Bethany giggling, Aeryn smirking, and then...her eldest daughter had grinned; openly, honestly, fondly at Fenris over some dry comment he'd made. 

As far as Leandra was concerned, that meant the elf was as welcome in her home as sunshine. 

Now, safely ensconced in her family estate, Leandra rarely saw the kitchen and Aeryn’s companions made themselves at home in her parlor. And besides the others, now there was Sebastian Vael. The last scion of that illustrious family who had written their name on Starkhaven. 

_Prince_ Vael, though Leandra still saw him often in the Chantry, as devoted as ever to his prayers. Dedication in all the elegant, handsome lines of his body as he worshiped in the Chant. 

Yet, he was clearly part of the crew, now. Learning his place, learning to fight in the group, earning his keep. Aeryn was starting to rely on him, Leandra could tell, especially as Varric was so often busy with family business. Sebastian explained once to Leandra that most of the profit he received went straight to Chantry coffers, and then, too, he was trying to build a fund to retake Starkhaven. 

But that wasn't the reason Sebastian Vael followed Leandra's daughter. Oh, no. 

Leandra had noticed Brother Vael's interest in Aeryn, long ago. The way he would veil his interest in pious, though honest, concern, offering to pray for her whenever Leandra crossed his path in the Chantry. Eager to hear of her in the days before Aeryn had asked him to fight with them. 

Even so, Leandra had been shocked to see him that first time. Covered in blood, bow on his shoulder, a flush of triumph on his cheekbones and a sparkle in his eye. She'd spoken his name, called him Brother Sebastian and he'd blushed and stammered, poor boy. 

He had been so quiet at first in the midst of Aeryn’s merry band. Now he joined in a bit, in their banter. In their fun. And he watched Aeryn, when she wasn't looking. Studied her daughter's sweet face as if he might find the Maker's truth written there. 

And Leandra had seen Aeryn watching Sebastian. Had seen her close her eyes and listen to him speak. Seen the slight, soft smile that would randomly cross her daughter's face before Aeryn, normally so controlled, could school it away. And also seen the clenched jaw and the dark sorrow that clouded her features on other occasions, when Aeryn thought she was alone. 

Leandra knew that look, too. Knew it intimately. Had seen it on her own face, in mirrors long ago, when she was in love with an apostate mercenary that she could never have. And it was like her daughter, to have chosen to love a priest of the Chantry. To have picked, finally, a man to love who had already made a commitment to the Maker’s own. 

But Sebastian Vael was no longer a priest. That was the rumor amongst the women at the Chantry, though there was no official recognition of the fact. The prince was seen often in the social scene of Kirkwall, somehow toeing a line between noble and religious as he curried favor. Prince Vael had no reason to hide his interest in women, in Aeryn, any longer. He probably saw more of Aeryn than Leandra did these days. 

And Leandra noticed differences in Aeryn. The late nights were fading. Aeryn didn"t come home smelling of sex anymore, with that loose limbed grace that had marked her casual encounters. She still didn't sleep. Leandra hadn't missed that. Aeryn still spent her nights in the garden, in practice. Or staring into the fire, with a glass (or bottle) for company. Or scrubbing the floors of the estate. And sometimes, Aeryn burst out of the house like she'd been wrapped in lightning, tension exuding from her like electricity. But she only came back with bruises, never lovebites, now. 

It was something to consider. 

Leaving them to their cards and stories, Leandra had gone to her rooms shortly after supper. She came down looking for a cool drink and wasn't surprised to hear a deep male voice countering Aeryn's low musical tone. Fenris often stayed...but, oh, that warm lilt never belonged to Fenris. 

Oh, dear. She really should go back upstairs. 

Dishes clattered as they were stacked. "Thanks, by the way for staying," Aeryn was saying. 

"You seemed to want to speak with me." Prince Vael's voice was gentle. The lilt was soothing and sweet and it was no wonder, Leandra thought, that Aeryn often stopped just to listen. 

"Yeah, I did." Glass tumblers clinked together and the fire hissed as something liquid was thrown into it. 

"Well, what then?" The archer sounded amused at Aeryn's hesitance. 

"You know, we all...we all tend to chatter when we fight. Foolish things. Bits of banter." 

"All but you, yes." 

"Well, not much of a sneak attack if you're babbling on about your prowess." 

The prince snorted. It was an inelegant noise to come from such a well born man, but it made Aeryn chuckle. "When we were fighting last night...you called out 'For Starkhaven.' But you also...Then you said..." 

"For Hawke." Oh. Oh, _my_. 

There was a pause and then Aeryn said forcefully "Sebastian...you can't...You aren't fighting _for_ me. I'm no general. You aren't fighting for my _honor_. We're all...partners." Sebastian tried to say something but Aeryn barreled through him. " _No_. Fight for your home, oh prince, if you choose to. Fight for your Maker, Brother Vael. I'm not... _yours_ to fight for," Aeryn finished firmly and Leandra's heart ached. She could finish that thought. _Not his, not anyone's_. 

Leandra couldn't quite make out Sebastian's next words, only the quiet, smooth tone. 

Out of long familiarity though, she picked up Aeryn's glib answer. "Does say Starkhaven right there on the mark, 'tis true. Anyway, I just wanted to...check. Stay for a minute, please? I picked up something the other day I think you'll like." Leandra just had time to scramble back into the darker hall before her daughter popped out of the study. Aeryn clearly thought herself alone because the emotion showed plainly, there was something like regret, loss, _longing_ on her lovely face as she trotted up the stairs.

He followed her, stepping into the doorway, and there was no doubting the longing written across his aristocratic features. Want, even. And something shockingly familiar, that half-starved look that now and again passed in Aeryn's eyes. Then very quietly, but sure, the archer spoke into the seemingly empty hall, brilliant eyes hooded and intense. "My bow and I are yours, Aeryn Hawke. As long as you'll have me near. Maker, forgive me." 

And though it was quietly spoken, the back of Leandra's neck prickled with the force of the declaration. Gracious. _Holy Andraste, guide them_. 

Sebastian (and Leandra decided that he was simply Sebastian, then. If he belonged to her daughter, then he belonged to Leandra, too.) rubbed at the back of his neck then, and as her daughter came back to the landing schooled his features into geniality. Huffed a reluctant laugh as she slid down the last bit of the banister to land near him. Leandra bit her lip to stop a scold. Her scapegrace. Her scoundrel girl. 

And this man loved her. 

Their Sebastian left not long after. Aeryn had handed him an amulet she'd...acquired...on her travels. He'd thanked her, sincerely, and when Aeryn had turned away briefly, Sebastian had touched the piece of jewelry with something like astonishment on his face. As if he'd never received a gift before. But that couldn't be right. 

He'd gathered up his pack and the bow by the door and Aeryn had closed it behind him with a soft reply to his “Good night, then, Hawke.”

Aeryn leaned her forehead heavily against the wood for a minute before shaking herself like a mabari and walking slowly back into the study, the door thudding shut. Leandra took her chance to escape back to her room. 

It didn't surprise Leandra to hear the rhythmic thump of knives from the garden, later, in the wee hours. Leandra hardly ever went down to check on Aeryn anymore, knowing that she'd just get her daughter's deflection and if she pushed too far, her rejection. 

The best way to keep Aeryn together was to work from a distance. Leandra had given Aeryn the quietest, darkest room in the estate, perfect for naps. Now Orana was here and, under the guise of learning new dishes, Aeryn had revived her interest in cooking, took more to eat. The hollows in her cheeks had filled out a bit, even if the shadows under her eyes remained. 

But considering what Leandra heard, earlier perhaps a little girl talk was in order. She pulled on her silly confection of a housewrap and padded down the stairs, again. From the tiny porch, she could see Aeryn's practice ring and her daughter, thrown into silhouette by the setting moonlight. The light also glinted off a bottle of something, nearly empty. Leandra could only hope it had loosened her daughter's tongue. 

Of course, Aeryn had heard her approach. "It's late. You should be asleep." As she straightened her limber body out of a complicated stretch. 

"I could say the same for you," Leandra chided just a little. 

Shrugging, Aeryn walked to the target to pull her knives, gleaming, sharp, and cold. "You know me, too much energy to sleep." And it was true Aeryn had never been a good sleeper, even as a baby. But back when she and Bethany and sometimes Carver had piled into the straw and feather tick in Lothering, Aeryn used to at least get more, a decent six hours or so. Now she had all feathers, fine linen, and a bed to herself and probably never got more than a few hours, even on good nights. 

"I heard Sebastian leaving." Aeryn raised one neat, arched eyebrow at her mother's informality and Leandra smiled a little, inwardly. It had been Malcolm who was good at dissembling. Leandra had always relied on her obviously guileless charm to cover any missteps. Aeryn, her little mimic, had picked up both techniques. "He seems to have grown fond of you." 

Ah, too far. Aeryn’s face went carefully blank, closed off, and her pale shoulders shrugged. "It's not what you think it was, Mother. He's just...looking for something to belong to. Somewhere he fits." 

But Leandra wanted to push. Aeryn could be too stubborn. "Could he not belong here, with you?" 

That drew out a bitter laugh. "Priest or prince, Mother. Now imagine what I am loving _either_. No. Doesn't work that way. Pretending otherwise is a fairy tale." But there was no cruelty in Aeryn's voice and her grey eyes were clear and level. Aeryn was telling the truth as far as she knew it. 

"Maybe not, darling. But what about the man?" 

Aeryn balanced one of her throwing knives across the back of her hand and flicked. The knife rotated in the air before she caught it, as it plunged to the earth. 

"It's no good, Mother. I'm not...he doesn't...It doesn't work. It's too late." Aeryn's shoulders hunched and her voice was thin and wan, the red lashes making dark curves under her downcast eyes. Heartsore, Leandra opened her arms, Aeryn slid into them, and for just a minute, Aeryn was her little girl again, craving comfort before she pulled away. "I'm sweaty, Mother. Don't let me ruin your gown." 

"I don't mind, my darling girl. I never did." 

"I know. But I do. That bit of frippery cost a fortune." Aeryn grinned and Leandra realized that she'd gone as far as she could. But she'd keep working. After all, Leandra had her own suitor now. And she couldn't leave Aeryn in this huge house, all alone. Merry band, notwithstanding, Aeryn needed Sebastian. And from the look on his face, he needed her, too. And knew it. 

There was time enough. Leandra went back to bed, making plans.

In her armoire upstairs, there was a length of beautiful silvery blue Orlesian silk, custom dyed to suit her gray eyed daughter who wore black too often. Leandra had meant to have it made up for Aeryn's name day. If they got to work, Leandra and Orana could have it done in a trice. Then she could have a small party, do a bit of strategic inviting, maybe even her own...beau. 

And see how Sebastian's beautiful eyes lit up when he saw their Aeryn in something besides leather. 

Oh, she couldn't wait!


End file.
